The Met Gala outfits were glorious, weird, and ripe for Twitter roasts


The 2021 Met Gala was held at New York’s Metropolitan Museum of Art on Monday, providing another occasion for rich people to dress in expensive, ostentatious costumes and show off. It’s a nice distraction from rampant wealth inequality and the fact that hundreds of people are still dying from COVID-19 in the U.S. every day.

This year’s Met Gala theme was “I​​n America: A Lexicon of Fashion,” yet there was a shocking dearth of guns, medical debt, or blatant racism. Instead, Hollywood’s starlets graced the Met with stars, stripes, and Shrek’s baby.

It’s difficult to say that Frank Ocean’s sickly gremlin robot infant isn’t emblematic of the state of the nation, but it also isn’t the first thing anyone thinks of when they think “America” — not even Ocean himself. When asked by Vogue to explain the meaning behind the acid green child, Ocean replied, “Movie magic. America. I don’t know.”

Kim Kardashian showed up wearing a fancy black Balenciaga morphsuit, which may seem weird but actually makes a lot of sense. I also often wish my physical form was more of a concept than reality.

Meanwhile, singer Kim Petras donned a Collina Strada horse head on her torso. Many Twitter users interpreted this sartorial choice as an homage to horse girls, but I interpreted as an homage to classic 1972 American crime film The Godfather.

Lil Nas X also rose to the occasion with not one but three glamorous Versace outfits, showing up every other man within a 50 foot radius as is his modus operandi. I don’t really see the connection to America, but I also don’t care. I would curl up in Lil Nas X’s cape and sleep for 27 years if the capitalist grind that torments us all did not keep me chained to agonising consciousness.

COVID-19 vaccination was reportedly a prerequisite to Met Gala attendance, so at least we now have a list of A-listers who have gotten the jab. The coronavirus killed 1895 people in the U.S. on Sunday, and will continue killing many more. But it’s nice that even in the face of rampant death and despair, pretty people in expensive clothes remain a familiar constant. Hopefully they’ll encourage more regular people in cheap clothes to get vaccinated as well.


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